So, here I sit in my living room. There is so much to feel on the inside, but so little willingness to do it. 4 months ago, promises were made. Here I sit, acknowledging that those promises were broken. Broken by me, with no one to blame, so to speak, except for myself. No one looks back at me in the mirror except for ... me. It is a very large me, kind of swollen and bloated looking. Deep down on the inside is the woman who is healthy, who is rock solid and dependable and committed and on track. How does she get and out start to be in charge and running the show? How does she get up the courage to step out, take charge, and most importantly, have the guts and the fortitude to succeed? She knows that she can. She has been very successful in the past. She has scurried up the corporate ladder with her brains, her wit, her emotion, her commitment. She has had successful relationships ( ok there is a reason why this wasnt listed first). She has lost bad habits in the past. She used to smoke, but quick cold turkey 9 years ago. She has the ability to make commitments to herself and to succeed. But she continues to dip her toe in the water for a bit, but then jerk it out rapidly, always making alot of excuses to herself about why she cannot continue. A lot of excuses ! So, back to the title of this post. I started training 4 months ago for this ride, with a promise to get in shape and ride well. I have done ok with the getting in shape piece, considering that I have 60 extra pounds to carry with me on the bike. But, that is not the promise I made to myself. I made a promise to lose that weight and get feeling and looking better. I made a promise to myself to take care of myself and improve the quality of my daily life.
I have broken those promises, but I must make new commitments. Just as I made the commitment to ride in this ride, I must commit each and every day of my life to making GOOD decisions about what enters my body and fuels my daily activities. That time is now. That time is here. God bless and God Speed!
So
